New term

So, we've had a break over summer and tomorrow it's back to class for me. I'm afraid D and S are not gong back to the group.

It's not all forgotton though. D will have one to one lessons at home once a month with my teacher from the Hungarian group. She's just started secondary school so has a lot on her plate at the moment, so I think this will be enough for her. I'm even thinking that Lovely hubby could join in too.. maybe.

I am so idealistic it's unreal!

We may take S to the group for a play now and then but nothing structured. Take it a bit slower I think is the key.

what now?

D doesn't want to do the lessons. She wants to learn but another way!? How?

S doesn't like the pre-school language group - well if you couldn't understand anything anyone said, how would you feel?

Lovely hubby doesn't want to spend saturday mornings telling S to sit down and listen etc. all the time

...and I don't want to console D after she's found the class too hard every saturday.....

WHAT NOW?

Socialising - Family Picnic

The Hungarian Cultural Group (HCG) organised a lovely social event last weekend - a picnic in a local forest park.

We decided to go along. I thought that it would be a great opportunity for the kids to spend more time just playing with others rather than learning. I was right, the kids loved it, just playing ball games and being out in the fresh air.

From an adult English perspective both LH and I said we felt rather guilty not having enough Hungarian to chat more socially and we didn't want to feel we were making the others have to speak English. The focus after all was on speaking Hungarian for a change. After a few small conversations in English we eventually ended up speaking mainly to the English members of the group. Mainly those married to Hungarians.

However, this is just a sign of the time we are in at the moment. Eventually we will be able to mix more and more in Hungarian.

But I would still go to more family social events like this because becoming more familiar with the families and the children feeling more connected is a huge boost to us all.

Having said that I will however refrain from the Hungarian women's dinner evenings at the moment as it would be just to unfair to expect them to speak English to me at these times. I'll wait till I can say more.

New Start

Our first day of the new term at the Hngarian Cultural Group went very well. I was so impressed with lovely hubby as he just totally embraced the pre-school group with S He said he enjoyed it and just got stuck in. S enjoyed it too and it was great to see him teaching LH the numbers 1-4 rather than the other way around.

D's class was new and there was only the two of them. (D and an 8yr old boy with a Hungarian mother) they both could not speak Hungarian so it was a total beginers class. She came out quite grumpy, I think she found it hard and different and the teacher's accent was a little difficult to understand at times. but later in the day, she said she was really pleased to go there. So I hope she remembers that when we go next.

My class was rock hard. I'm just about hanging in there. But i'm loving it.

So far so good!

Language classes mark 3

Ok we start another version of family learning this week. I will go to adult class. Wonderfully, d can go to a starter group for children who can't speak Hungarian - Thankyou Hungarian Group for starting this up just in time for us to be there! and lovely hubby - as I will now call him has yet again agreed to take s to the pre-school group.

This better go ok...

Bilingual UK

I've decided to start a google group dedicated to bilingualism in the UK. You can e-mail this group at mothertonguebooksuk.googlegroups.com rather a long name I know.

Hopefully it will become a great site for resources, information exchange and discussion. Let's see.

Is that a new word?

I asked my son what he would like for sweet after tea (meaning dessert or pudding) obviously I've never really called it that before as he said what do you mean? When I explained it meant dessert, he said,
"Is that a new Hungarian word then?"

aah! so sweet but lovely to see his language assimilation of English and Hungarian words almost as one.

Nagyon Jo! - Very Good !

My kids made me so proud tonight. They initiated a bilingual game together, whereby they had to ask each other questions like, what is dog in Hungarian? and then praised each other with Igen, nagyon jo (yes, very good) if they got it right. Gaining points along the way.

It was lovely to hear them enjoying their language learning adventure.

Nagyon Jo

At last!

Ok, so the logistics of getting us all speaking Hungarian is not going to be easy and once again I've had to re-evaluate how it's going to work. 'm beginning to doubt if bilingual is possible but certainly learning some to get by will be.

I took d to the language class last week as hubby needed a break and s was unwell.They stayed at home. It was our first class and within five minutes it was obvious that it was too advanced for her. well, it is an adult class that had started a few months ago. I could just about keep up with the basics I had, so she had no chance. But dutifully she stayed the whole 2 hours.

So, the new plan. I will go to the Hungarian class myself - one lifelong ambition realised? - check. Finally, I can't believe it.

D & S are going to have lessons at home each week. Hopefully in April the Hungarian group is starting a children's class for beginners which d could join. S will have to wait until he is 6 but we could continue with lessons at home for him till then. Hubby will learn if he wants to but will have to organise his own way, with us all helping him.

So, there we are all sorted. for now. In about a year and a half we will actually all be ready to attend the Hungarian group as a family, but until then we'll need to master more of the language.

Compromise & Disapointment

So Hubby has agreed to take (s) to the pre-school group at our Hungarian Group. I will take (d) to the language class, which comprises of 3 men married to Hungarian women and one 8yr old boy.

But I keep thinking, what if (s) gets a bit withdrawn and quiet as he can't understand the language, and wants me instead. Plus I will have to come out of the class during the 40minute folk dancing as (d) won't go without me and I can't see Hubby dancing yet.

It's all getting a bit logistically difficult until I realise that Hubby should join the men in the language class and I should join the women in the pre-school group. This makes much more sense - except I'm not going to learn so much.

Never mind compromise it is.

Joining the Hungarian Group

We were late.. as usual, I'm a teriible time keeper. But because of this all the doors into the building for the Hungarian Group were locked. It's the oldest building in town and a labyrinth of courtyards, corridors and staircases, We've never been there before.

It was pouring with rain, (s) was getting scared because we couldn't find the in door and the building looked like something from Harry Potter (which he's just started watching lately) (d) was stressed because she always is when starting something new and I was cold and wet. Husband was keeping calm on the surface. Not the start to our language journey I was hoping for.

Finally, we got in, followed the bilingual signs and started to hear the distant hum of the Hungarian spoken language ahead. The first thing I saw on entering the room was lovely cakes and tea. Then we joined the kindergarten group singing nursery rhymes. (d) & (h) watched from safety of the chairs around the walls of the room. The leader was talking fast in Hungarian - of course - what did I expect - that they would all stop talking Hungarian and speak English because we'd arrived? No this was going to be hard. We felt like aliens just landed.

(s) did really well, he joined in all the actions, took his turn to bang the drum in the centre of the circle and seemed to enjoy it. I did notice he was becoming more and more quiet - I guess not understanding anything can do that to you.

Next was folk dancing downstairs. A beautiful young teacher dressed in Hungarian dance attire organised the children and parents and began to explain the routines. This was easier to follow as we only needed to watch her to know what to do. But I felt sorry for (d) who was by far the oldest (the average age was 2yrs) but she joined in well and kept smiling. Both children recognised Hungarian words and told me when they did so. That was promising I thought. The dance went on for a long time and Ben started to make a friend.

Next it was time for those lovely cakes and then a visit to the adult language class. The class is suitable for (d) and as most of the children her age are in a Hungarian catch up class being native speakers this will probably be the best place for her and I. Leaving (h)&(s) to enjoy nursery rhymes and craft upstairs. What a star (h) is supporting my ambitious goal.

Finally it was free time and we had a chance to chat to some of the English spouses mainly husbands. We felt a bit more at home then and when asked why we wanted to learn Hungarian, the alien feeling melted and I felt more legitimate in being able to say "I'm half Hungarian and want to learn the language".

This is not going to be easy and we all feel a bit daunted and out of our depth. I keep telling myself that this is the hardest day. We will only keep on learning new words and getting to know people, so it will only get easier from here... won't it?

Meeting new Hungarians

Tomorrow my family, husband included, will join a Hungarian group. I'm really excited about this and can't wait to start the language classes. (d) is really interested in the folk dancing on offer and (s) just wants to play superheros (well he is only 4).

It's going to be tough though. (s) is going to find it all the easiest, being the youngest. (d) will probably have a difficult time at first as their is no stuctured language class for her age, she will have to learn by joining in with the other kids and that will not be easy for her. I hope it doesn't put her off.

Hopefully the almost promise of a trip to Hungary with her nagypapa(grandfather) this year will keep her spirit up if communication becomes hard.

A piece of kek (cake)

I'm feeling very optimistic today with our language learning.

Whilst playing with children tonight we started singing nursery rhymes and I realised that we could actually change some of the English words to Hungarian and sing those instead! mainly colour and number words.

But what really astounded me was that my (s) immediately volunteered the Hungarian word for blue - kek (p.cake)- after only chatting about that word once before a few days ago!

He had remembered the word immediately and used it in the correct context later - language learning in children is just amazing!

bilingual labels - cimke (tseem-ke)

Today (s) (aged 4) and I are putting bilingual labels around the house with the names of objects in English and Hungarian.

One colour for English and one for the Hungarian; as he is just learning his letters at nursery he will need to know which are Hungarian words.

Need to think about forming letters as his nursery does to help his newly forming writing,reading & spelling skills.

Also putting pronunciation of Hungarian words in brackets so we all learn how to say it properly.

Who am I

I was talking with a friend of mine who is English with a German mother. Like me she was brought up in England but had the continental influence in her home such as different foods, traditions, language etc. She was bilingual (although hasn't used the German language for a long time now). She said that when she went to Germany she did not connect at all with her German heritage. She said she did not feel German at all when she was there. Perhaps because she had no immediate family there.

However, we both shared the same experience of not really feeling English either. Personally I feel more English when I go to Hungary and more Hungarian when I am in England. I don't fit very neatly into either camp. I am, I believe neither one nor the other.

When I am around my Hungarian relatives I visually connect with them because some of us look similar but we can't communicate with each other and they are relative strangers. I guess this happens anyway with full English families which grow apart and then all meet up again at a wedding or something. But at least they can speak and catch up with each other.

What is this feeling of being neither one nationality or another, is it European? is it bicultural? or is it an outsider trying to connect? Like a square peg in a round hole, it will never fit no matter how hard you try... But also that is the beauty of it!

The Awakening

My daughter (d) is 11 now and has started asking to learn Hungarian. I think her new and developing identity is beginning to understand that she is part Hungarian and for the first time she is really questioning how it fits into her life.

At the recent Christmas carol concert some foreign children in her class were to wish the audience a merry Christmas in their home language. I was so proud when d told me that she had asked her teacher if she could say it in Hungarian.

She rang her Papa that evening who dutifully gave her a simplistic phrase to say and taught her the pronunciation. She kept the phonetic, English spelling of it up on show in her room so she could keep practicing it - boldog koraachoynt kivaanok

She was a star when the night came "boldog karacsont kivanok" clear as a bell.
Not only did she stand up and speak in her concert but she did it in a foreign language! wow that's my girl xx